Saying Yes

"Happiness is what matters with children.
     Happiness and harmony."
Veruca Salt's mother in Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory

She makes this comment after Veruca's father shuts down his nut factory to have
 all of his workers open cases and cases of Wonka bars to find Veruca a golden ticket.  

We only meet this women in this one scene, but we get quite a perspective on her take on parenting in this little glimpse.  She tolerates rude, disrepectful, out of control behavior without even a flinch. This scene always makes me smile (and secretly appreciate my own sweet girls!) and since we have a penchant for quoting movie lines at our house, this one pops up occassionally.  But I've been thinking about the truth in this statement this week.....

Children need to be happy.  They need to be allowed to experience life and the world without the stress and anxiety we adults sometimes thrust on them much too soon.  It should be okay to giggle, to roll on the floor, to eat snacks whenever you need one and to truly get excited about seeing a BIG GARBAGE TRUCK. 

When my middle daughter was three, she was fascinated with garbage and what happened to it.  When she learned what that bi-weekly rumble of noise coming down our street was, she would run to me and pull me out the front door.  We would sit on the front step and watch the men in orange jumpsuits hook our tall green trashcan to their enormous yellow truck.  Then the big green button was pushed and the garbage can was lifted high into the air and then magically tipped over sending our empty milk carton, macaroni & cheese boxes and apple cores into the big hopper attached to the truck.  As the garbage can would lower to the ground, we would hear the "monster" inside chomping down on our trash and filling up his tummy with our leftovers.  Mollie and I would talk about the process over and over.  Sometimes she would run out to the garbage men and tell them thank you or deliver a picture she had colored for them.  For Christmas that year, we had to make a treat box for her to deliver to her "garbage guys".  This went on for the two years we lived in Texas.  She was fascinated and that garbage ritual made her so happy.  It was a little thing, but the happiness it brought was more than worth the ten minutes every Tuesday and Thursday afternoon I spent away from my chores with my little girl.  Her big sister was at school, her little sister was asleep and it was just the two of us. We talked and learned from each other and built a bond.

Don't spoil your little "Verucas" by giving them every THING they think they want, but do bring a lot of happiness and harmony into your home by giving them every MOMENT that they need with you. 

A wise woman, Marjorie Hinckley, said: “My mother taught me some basic philosophies of rearing children. One is that you have to trust them. I tried hard never to say "no" if I could possibly say "yes". I think that worked well because it gave my children the feeling that I trusted them and they were responsible to do the best they could.”  

So, say yes today--even if it is a smelly garbage truck.  You never know just what you might learn--maybe even the essentials.-------Love, Katie